Living in Jakarta I usually commute using public transportation. To go from home to the nearest LRT or city bus station and vice versa, I use an online motorcycle taxi service.

When using these services, I always get a different driver. Each driver has unique stories and a background that I can dig deeper into, and they almost always give me new insights, ideas, and perspectives.

Often drivers will not start the conversation. That’s because they transport dozens of passengers every day and not every customer enjoys or is in the mood for a conversation. I always start the conversation. When the conversation starts, it usually will not stop until I reach my destination.

I can talk about all sorts of things: places, culture, politics, economy, styles, events, vehicles, weather, etc. Topics can have interconnections with each other, and this leads to opportunities to talk about other topics.

When you treat every encounter as an opportunity for learning, you are not only learning from books or experts. You are learning from experience lived by ordinary people. Recognize that insight comes from unexpected places.

I believe that every person carries knowledge shaped by their unique experience. They see patterns I don’t and navigate challenges I’ve never faced. By asking questions and listening, I’m mining for truth that I can’t access any other way.

Obviously not every driver I meet would enjoy having a conversation. They may be an introvert or simply just tired, and that’s fine. I use this time to swim in my own thoughts or just enjoy viewing the buildings I pass along the way.

Appendix

These are the conversation openers that I usually use when I want to talk to drivers. Feel free to contact me and tell me what you usually say or ask.

• “Narik dari jam berapa?” (“What time did you start driving today?”)
• I talk about today’s or yesterday’s weather.
• “Abis jemput?” (“Just dropped someone off?”)
• “Asal dari mana?” (“Where are you from originally?”)
• I ask about the app they use, usually about its features, fares, and drawbacks.
• “Udah dapat berapa order?” (“How many orders have you gotten so far?”)

It’s not uncommon for me to hang out with drivers at a coffee stall after the trip, or invite drivers to my home for a drink when we arrive.

I don’t just talk to taxi drivers, but also to coffee stall vendors, parking attendants, security guards, or people taking a break from their office jobs.

You can help anyone with tools you have.

Every tool is a helper. Pencil, book, computer, software, lawnmower, car, etc.

You can help using your mind; give a solution no one ever thought before. You can help using your heart; say something that reassures or gives hope. You can help using your time; listen, be present.

Your hands are also your tool.

When you help someone, you may feel altruistic. Your joy becomes my joy. You give empathy, you get back satisfaction. Helping people may also consumes you when you give too much. Spend only the necessary.

I always try to help people around me when they need help. If they ask, I’ll try my best. If they don’t and I see they need a hand, I offer. If they reject, I check once if they’re just being polite. If they decline again, I respect it.

I will help if I physically can, if I’m capable, and if I have time to set aside. When I don’t have time, I’ll make time if the priority changes.

I can’t help people who don’t want my help. It wastes both their and my time. Perhaps they’d better get help from someone else or figure it out themselves. I can’t help people who are just using me. It wastes my time. Perhaps I’d better save my tools for those who value it as a gift.

When you assist anyone, lend both hands, and stay on your feet.